I was thinking about how people say you make your own luck in life and ,success is down to hard work and a bit of luck,and i think it is only people who deem themselves to have" made "it who can make such statements.
I am sure it is just a matter of the roll of the dice.Life is unfair ,some people sail through life,others carry burdens with them from birth.
How do you equate bringing up your children to being honest ,good ,hard-working ,responsible citizens and that you will get what you deserve if you do follow those rules,when it is so often not the case and those who merit a good life,are often plagued with bad luck ,be it health,poverty ,tragedy after tragedy,which no amount of hard work will get you out of.?
When I first got cancer,I remember my son blaming it on his school-and then the house we moved to at the same time -saying they brought bad luck. I suppose he needed to label it ,and this was his way of coping.Move schools and home and the cancer and bad luck would disappear.!If Only!
My brothers and sister have been financially lucky and they put this down to their hard work and they deserve their new -found freedom of not having to worry about paying bills,but they worked no harder in life than i did ,they were just clever enough to be in the right place at the right time.Out of the four of us , I was also the unlucky one to have been struck down with cancer.
So what lessons do you give your children?
I suppose it is not to expect anything ,but to appreciate the good things you do have,to respect yourselves,to have good manners,to look at the world and see it for what it is ,warts and all ,and know that you can only do what will make you feel a better person.It is good to be passionate about something
,but don`t think life owes you anything.
I am sorry if this is a bit of an incoherent ramble,but stream of conscience and all that and i don `t have a psychiatrist.....
I had news from a friend yesterday who has just become a grandparent for the first time and is cock-a-hoop,and i am so pleased for her .I think there is nothing that can beat a new life,especially a cherished one.
The sun is out again and i really should go and spend a bit of time in it -hope your day is good.
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Caroline, I'm not really comfortable talking about this because I'm one of the lucky ones. From my point of view, life is most definitely about luck, but also about making good decisions. Now I'm very uncomfortable because it's only a short step from that statement to making a judgement.
RépondreSupprimerSometimes the bad luck outweighs the good decisions, or has nothing at all to do with them, like the person who is badly injured in a car crash that's not their fault. But the flip side is also true, that good decisions outweigh bad luck, because some of what we perceive as luck, isn't that at all. It might not be hard work either, but simply a better decision.
I've always felt like a lucky person, but also feared that one day I would pay for having all that luck - that inevitably it would run out, because it's really not fair to be so fortunate. It's ridiculous to be superstitious, but as you pointed out, luck can be so random in its postive or negative aspects that in the end you just give up trying to understand it and just cross your fingers.
You're also right that life doesn't owe you anything and it's not bad to be reminded of that. Now look who's incoherent!! You weren't in the least. xoxoDeb
Totally coherent Caroline. I think the best thing we can teach our children and to strive our best to do too, is 'do the right thing by others', but to know that anything can happen to any one of us at any time so to always cherish what we have, however insignificant it may seem (though I'm not saying this is an easy thing to do!).
RépondreSupprimer'Doing the right thing' takes in the manners and the consideration, but it also encompasses the concepts of thoughtfulness, helpfulness, kindness, giving. It also means 'taking', in the form of accepting gifts, in whatever form they come - material gifts, gifts of time, gifts of kindness. We all like to give, so having someone accept that gift is a gift in itself. Am I the one starting to ramble now? XXX
Dear Caroline I came over from Friko via Deborah to your neck of the woods. I have read your story and as a retired oncology RN would like to offer you support through my WOW group.
RépondreSupprimerThis is something myself and other holistic RNs came up with when I was working and I choose to continue through this medium in my retirement. Read the significance of the pin and accept if you see appropriate. Blessings
Peggy (QMM)
Caroline - found you today through Peggy's blog (QMM). You are so brave - and I admire your ability to share your feelings and experiences. Just want you to know that my prayers are with you.
RépondreSupprimerCaroline, this is where you'll find the 'pin' Peggy meant, just in case you weren't sure where to go.
RépondreSupprimerhttp://womanofwisdom-peggy.blogspot.com/
I think you can have luck in some things and not in others, that it is erratic. I also think that bad luck can sometimes be avoided. For example if one smokes two packs of Gauloises a day, they may end up with emphysema or lung cancer. Or if one decide to work in those unhealthy coal mines in West Virginia one can end up with black lungs. Trying to lead a healthy life style is good but sometimes hard to achieve. I heard about this community in California where so many people got cancer and did not know why then found that their houses were built on chemical dumps. But on the other end we have heard of people doing everything right and still getting sick. So I agree with you “it is just a matter of the roll of the dice.”
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